This first recording of the year is all about “new year, new you” if you are that person who loves to ride the newness of a new year this podcast is for you. As humans we love new beginnings, we see them a s great place to start new habits. Mondays are another great example of this, or sometimes its tomorrow “let’s start tomorrow” “let’s start Monday” “let’s start in the new year”
Of course, if we choose, we can start anything we want any day we want, within reason.
So why do we always want to wait until tomorrow or Monday? It’s an excuse, it’s a reason not to do it now, chances are by the time tomorrow, Monday or the next day have come we will have forgotten what it was we said we would do. The further away the suggested start date is, the bigger the resistance or excuse.
So, why do we do this..? Us humans don’t really like change, and the mind definitely doesn’t like change. The mind is all about survival, this is its primary function. So, when the mind is faced with change it resists, it will find excuses, any excuse not to allow change. We often talk about the mind being amazing and how we don’t access all of its power, yet in this instance, the mind is pretty stupid. Consider this the next time you are trying to bring about some change in your life, consider this the next time you are trying to lose some weight, gain some weight, change unhelpful unhealthy habits. Remember the mind will not want to support you on this, not only will the mind not want to support you it will do all it can to sabotage your ideas.
Imagine, for example that you want to stop smoking: we know that stopping smoking is really good for us, we know the health benefits we would gain from not smoking, yet the mind will do it can to sabotage your ideas of stopping. All the mind sees is change, it doesn’t like change because it can’t see the outcome, and this becomes a threat. In some ways the mind is pretty simple. Override it, watch out for it and make the change you wish.
Motivation is something people struggle with, motivation to make the changes that you want especially at this time of year. 1st January, everyone is motivated, but how long does it last..? we soon get bored, we soon lose that enthusiasm, I have a little trick for you:
We become motivated through positive words. I never leave the gym and say in my mind “that was a terrible workout” or “you could have done so much better” if I do this, my mind hears these words. The next time I consider going to the gym, my mind isn’t on board because the last time we went the outcome (the words I said to myself) wasn’t good. The mind can only judge an experience based on what it hears us say about the experience. If I leave the gym and say “great workout, well done” that’s what my mind hears.
Next time I think about going to the gym, my mind is on board and more motivated to go. It’s just a little trick, but it will work.
We become motivated by good feedback, it doesn’t matter if that comes from us or from others, we need positive words to keep us going forward. If your every giving feedback to someone else, always try to give a positive followed by a learning point (we don’t call them negatives) followed by another positive. We hear learning points (negatives) five times louder than we hear positives, this again is because the mind is all about survival so thinks by hearing the learning points and making them bigger it is keeping us alive; chances are, it
is only stopping us from growing. If we don’t grow and develop, we actually become more vulnerable as those around us keep growing. Therefore, putting us to the lower end of the pack.
During this podcast we also talked about social media and how that can impact on our motivation or more likely demotivate. Josh talks about what we see on social media and the reality of what we see. Ellie is a personal trainer so has lots of great words on staying motivated and on track to reach goals.
Remember that we can change things anyway any hour we choose to.
Ask yourself am I putting this off, ask yourself what your resistance is? Only by doing this, only by being very honest with yourself will you actually change what it is you want to change.
I want to take this opportunity to thank you for listening to our podcasts and reading these blogs, I really do hope that something you read or hear sparks something in you to change and become the person you desire.
There is, in all of us the ability to change and grow.
We are always looking for guests on our podcasts, if know of anyone who has a story or experience in mental health and wellbeing, tell them to get in touch.
I can be reached through Guthrietherapy Facebook page.
Wishing you all a very successful and peaceful 2020.
Peace and love,
Kev x